Day 12 In The Hole

Journal Entry:

Well I took the dreaded shower today. It sucked! I froze the entire time. In cold water I washed my body. I also shaved my neckline and armpits.

After I was done, it took them 20 minutes to get me outta the shower cage and back to my cell. Another reason why I hate to shower in here.

But at least they didn’t hit my cell and take my food. Or anything else for that matter. I’m only allowed 2 pencils. I have 11. I also have an extra t-shirt, towel, and a wash rag. Damn! I really am a bad boy.

***

As I read this journal entry and share it with you, I clearly see the errors of my ways.

Back then, I thought having these extra items is insignificant. What’s the harm? It’s no big deal.

I now realize it was a big deal. It shows my inability to follow simple rules. And that alone is significant. It shows the equitable outworking of my evolving, yet unevolved self.

This part of my mind that allows me to break insignificant rules, is responsible for my suffering, ignorance, and blindness. This is why I went to the hole for 7 months.

Armed with this knowledge as I reflect on my past, I realize that I deserve everything I’ve gotten outta life. Everything was justly ordered. I put myself in prison. I put myself in the hole.

Unless I change every little aspect of my thinking, I will continue to live in an undesirable environment. An environment I created for myself…regardless of my address.

And with that, I’ll leave you with a closing thought: Good thoughts & actions won’t produce bad results; bad thoughts & actions won’t produce good results. This is a law that will not error.

Peace,
Steven Jennings

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8 thoughts on “Day 12 In The Hole

  1. brianbalke says:

    When I first faced feelings like this, it was like my heart was going to break. I finally realized that it was just the rust on the hinges breaking loose. I hope that you find the same presence within that I did.

    Liked by 1 person

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