Day 15 In The Hole

 

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I am sharing the journal I kept while I did 7 months in the hole.

Journal entry from 12/10/08:

Well today I went to my hearing and get 30 days in the hole. I lost 45 days of goodtime.

I get out of the hole on Christmas day. I’m very excited. I was expecting to get several months in the hole. 30 days is not bad for getting caught with a Blackberry Pearl 5150 cell phone! Yes, it was sooo worth it. I got my first taste of modern technology. (internet, pics, vids, selfies…all that!) I’d spend hours in chatrooms. I met tons of women who really liked me.

I’m a little sad. But I don’t wanna be sad. So I’ll focus on something else. Like origami.

I just finished making two stealth bombers. I’m learning from this book I have. It’s very challenging. The first one I completely messed up. But the second one looks much better. Will there be a third? Nope. I’m done with all that! I felt like giving up before I finished the 1st one, but I stuck with it despite my impatience and frustration.

***

As I reflect back on this, I remember what it was like in that cold cell. I remember starting to feel sad. I could’ve allowed my thoughts to really beat me up. And to some degree, I did.

But right now as I write this, I realize that suffering & sadness is always the result of wrong thinking. Suffering and sadness is an indication that an individual is out of harmony with themselves and their situation.

For example, if I’m in the hole stressing about my cell phone and all my girlfriends, then that means I’m out of harmony with myself and my situation. Those things are gone! And there’s NOTHING I can do about it!

However, if I change my thoughts, I then eliminate the material that creates wrong thinking. And that’s what I did. I switched gears from feeling sad and started thinking about something different, like origami.

MORAL: Happiness & harmony are created by proper thinking.

 

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Steven Jennings

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